Dear pipsqueaks,
The past few weeks have certainly been a challenge, and in a good way, forced me to deal with things that I've dreaded to face. Nonetheless, just picturing what is ahead for me this month, I don't think I can afford to lose any more focus or control. You could say, I'm not setting myself up to fail or, worse, disappoint.
After all that's been said and done, "le bf" will no longer bring reference to anyone in particular anymore. It wasn't so much about being miles apart physically, but miles apart on the inside. I can't quite explain why at the moment, but it will be a subject for further pondering later on. At this moment, I cannot give anymore attention to this with everything else that's happening. Like I always say, if I can't do my best, I'd rather not do it at all.
So what else is happening? Well, work for one. Moving for two.
I've always enjoyed work, or found ways to enjoy it at least. But following a brief staff meeting of what's to come in the next couple of weeks, I suddenly felt overly stressed. I haven't felt this way in a long time actually. It's almost abnormal because my organizational skills allow me to put everything into a perspective that is doable. One at a time. Prioritize. Yet, when I knew everything will take place at the same time, if not consecutively, it really threw me off. Everything suddenly became a priority.
How is that even possible? Even during school, I've never gotten myself into such a mess with assignments, papers and exams. I've always handled whatever it is through proper planning and time management.
Though, work is rather different. Sad to say, it demands teamwork - some sort of assembly line. You are only a part of it, however large or small of a task, you cannot complete it alone. Unless you're in a position to make all the calls, then that's a different story. Otherwise, you are to be a team player. So, whether you have plans or not, it can only happen when everything else falls through. How annoying is that? Very. Nonetheless, that's the challenge before me. I may not know what's to come, but I'll be ready. As usual, I'll bring my 'A' game.
When, or if, I make it through all that, I have to move. This home of mine for the past two years have been a blessing to me. It allowed me to be close to work and the luxury of hotel facilities, most importantly the gym. Though recently, I grew quite fond of the basketball court and the table tennis corner. It'll certainly be a change I'll need to adjust. Then again, that's if I find a suitable place to stay to adjust to. I do have a plan B - a great one actually - but most preferably, I would still like to stay near the office. No offence, but KL Metro system isn't the most friendly. Not to mention packing and unpacking, total wipe down of the new place, and familiarization process. Now that I think about all this change, it does excite me a little. It will certainly be a milestone for me because I'll finally have a kitchen! The first recipe shall be one to remember...
A slight ease now that I've 'gone through' the whole next few weeks in some detail. Quite amazingly, it doesn't feel as horrendous. Maybe this is what they call mental preparation - doing a run through to familiarize yourself with all the potential emotions and strains so there aren't any surprises. Possibly. Well, that seem to do the trick! Back to my cheery self :)
Even better? It's gym time!
Be excited when a challenge arises, because it is moments like these that you discover you can be much, much more.