Dear pipsqueaks,
Today marks a very special day. A day to celebrate the existence of the most awesome people in the world: Moms. Unfortunately for me, I don't get to share my appreciation for her as I'm working abroad. But, of course, I gave her a rang to remind her that I miss her dearly everyday, even though I don't call every day. It's an unspoken understanding that I do.
Odd enough, I don't regret not being able to do all that now (as I'm in Malaysia and she's in Taiwan) probably because I've always managed to squeeze in a little something in our daily lives when we were still under the same roof...
["She must be thirsty"]
I remember when she used to spend hours in the kitchen like a traditional Taiwanese wife preparing the perfect meals: congee with veggies and meat for breakfast; rice with mixed veggies/meat for lunch; and a full set menu of a dish of veggies, fish, meat and a cauldron of soup for dinner. She'd always try to change the ingredients and methods of cooking so we don't eat the same dish in the same week. Now that's what I call professional chef. I can't fathom what it's like doing groceries having to map out a whole week's worth of dishes without overlapping. *I'm having a headache just thinking about it!* But yes, we had been spoiled by home-cooked food- so you can imagine, after being "drugged" for more than 22 years of my life with her secret recipes, it's painful not being able to get my dose now.
Oh my, I've been so off-tracked. Anyway, as I was going to say, seeing her slave over in the kitchen, I'd always wanted to do something for her. Except, when I was little, I couldn't help. When I was older, I had to study. So it never got to the point of me taking over. But, I found ways to show her that I appreciated her by bring her a glass of water. For some bizarre reason, I had always thought water would make her feel better. So whenever I caught her doing the dishes, I'd bring her a glass of water, making her drink it even though I was being a total distraction. But that's how it had been for years. Whether she realised it or not, it's just my way of showing that I recognise her hard work and appreciate all that she does to fill up my never-filling tummy.
[A Kiss Goodbye]
There was a time when I still participated in the "tuck me into bed with a kiss" or else I can't sleep routine. Then, for some reason, I just stopped. Actually, it never occurred to me that had stopped until years later, and that was when I thought to start another habit: the Goodbye Kiss. Every time I leave her to go somewhere, be it going to school or going out with friends, I'd give her a quick kiss. Just to know that if anything happens, the last thing I gave her was a kiss. No regrets. That reminds me of this one time, I got into a fight with her before I left for class and I actually decided to punish her by not giving her a kiss. Boy, did I feel guilty the WHOLE day. So, the first thing I did when I got home was to give her a big fat kiss. All better :)
Undoubtedly, there were many other ways that I thought to myself were brilliant methods to show how much I care without being all gushy (Yah, it's the weirdest thing that I tend to be a tough one with the family- possibly linked to wanting to prove that I can take care of myself, which in turn reassures them not to worry about me? Possibly). I think the most basic and obvious way to give back to parents is to take good care of yourself, knowing that ultimately that's what they really want. If you asked any parent what he/she would hope for his/her kids, most often it wouldn't be luxury or fame, but rather, health and safety. It's a win-win situation for both. Anyhow, it's never too late to show your care and appreciation if you haven't done so already. It doesn't have to be major, but it has to be present somehow.
Believe it or not, I was probably one of the only few seniors that still brought to school home-made lunches. In a way, it's to allow her to continue her "My baby needs me" fallacy. Well, I'll always need her, but not in the same context any more. I could've taken over her kitchen and make my own meals, do my own laundry, or tuck myself to sleep, but knowing that it gives her great pleasure in doing all those motherly things, I just left those "very important" duties for her, as long as she still wanted them. There will be a time when I shall take over, but it will be when she's ready. In any case, I've learned from the best.
Thank you, Mom. I love you always.